Monthly Archives: May 2016

Life on Life’s Terms

Hello Again Recruits! 

I am believing that this post finds everyone combat ready and eager to fight for recovery.


I wanted to talk today about living “Life on Life’s Terms”. We hear that a lot in the 12 step rooms, in our treatment episodes and by just about everyone in recovery. What does this term mean to you? After the post, leave us a comment. I am waiting to hear from you on this topic and any other that you would like to talk about.

Some housekeeping –I will be adding an email sign up list as well as a testimonials page for those that have a story that they wanted to tell about their recovery efforts and experiences.

 Ok, back to the point. Life on life’s terms.

I had a client this week that was talking about how she doesn’t agree with the treatment that she is receiving from her “addictions” doctor. She basically stated that she can’t relate to this provider on ANY level. WOW that throws down a “Flag on the Play”, as well as alotta other issues for me as a counselor.  My thought is that your doc is your biggest fan, they are in it with you so YOU can win it. More on that in another post.

But that’s not where I want to drive you today. this gave me a unique hand to hand combat training moment for this person. They aren’t new to recovery. They have overcome many, many obstacles in their recovery process. This particular event was very hard for her to not only understand but to relate to. 

I stated that she needed to look at this issue from another angle. This was a  ‘life on life’s terms’ moment. Life is rarely fair. This was an opportunity for her to practice allllll of the coping skills she’s learned, to analyze past battles and apply some knowledge on how to overcome this bump in her recovery road.

Does this make sense?  Life happens every day when we are in our recovery processes. It’s different, beautiful, bloody, smelly, joyous and just about every other descriptive word you could think of. The difference between now and our addictive days is that we are just that; in the NOW. Nothing is medicating what we feel, sense and deal with.

Most addicts medicated themselves with whatever. NOW it’s an everyday life living, in the moment adventure or nightmare. This is all relative to what’s happening or not happening in your life. And let’s be honest, for the newcomer and for ourselves. Every day is NOT a dream in the celestial realm of the wonderland home world. SOME DAYS JUST SUCK!!! But all of us, with a lil time, know that you put on your big girl/bigboy drawers -lace up the bootstraps and DEAL WITH IT THE BEST WAY YOU CAN.

That looks different every day for every different person. Some of us call our sponsor/mentor. Many may go to church/Mosque/Temple or other spiritual avenue. You can go to any of the many 12 step meetings that fit your circumstance. Some of us talk to our bff or significant other, some of us laugh manically (oh that’s probably just me sorry). Some of us cry, work out, garden, work overtime, some of us do____________  (Fill in the blank for what you use to cope).

What is my point.

Here it is…no matter what life throws our way—we don’t pick up. We don’t even look at this as an option. Let’s say that we draw our strength from any number of things in our arsenal. This is one of the 1st basic training lessons that we come to rely on. That no matter what happens– we deal, cope, shelf or work out the life issue.

No money for rent? Well at least you are paying rent-some of us lived under bridges or in abandaminiums. Hot dogs and beans for dinner for the next 3 days? At least you have something in your belly. Remember when YOU NEVER ATE because you didn’t want to be $2 short for the drug boys.  Teenage kids of yours driving you up the flipping wall? Some of us never got the custody of our children back from our stint in hell-at least you have yours.


We have to remain grateful and thankful no matter what. The old adage-when life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Same principle. Whatever this life throws at you, at least your alive and you can FEEL IT. Remember when you were so numb that you couldn’t feel anything at all? I sure do. 

We are in this together: to live, to train and to share. Reach out. IT’s okay to ask for help. Just don’t get mad if the person doesn’t join the pity party.

Until next time. Let’s all have some lemonade. lemonaid


thanks to for the photo